Growing up Gals: Fearful or Fearless?

As we grow older, do we become more fearful or fearless of things around us?
For me, I knew my fears pretty early in life – fear of heights, fear of roller-coaster, fear of cockroaches. And sadly, the 3 fears have grown up together with me, like my unwanted best friends.

So I was fascinated to see how this phenomena will turn out in my girls’ lives.

Joey (11 years old), typical first born child (like me). Independent, bossy, self-motivated (like me).
Jayne (8 years old), typical younger sibling (if there is one). Shows more public affections, not as independent, slightly less motivated (like Kless’ brother).

Just a few years back, I remembered that Joey was still a timid girl, not willing to try most of the activities that required her to climb or jump or with speed. Of course, I am more than willing to accompany her since I am one not given to fast speed activities too. But on hind sight, I am thinking did I stifle her growth in courage or trust by not encouraging her to try?
Jayne on the other hand, was more willing to take the water slides and do the 4D rides, etc.

As time passed, things seems to change a bit. Joey grew bolder and Jayne took lesser interest in the exciting stuff.

We brought the girls to a small indoor rock climbing studio recently. Hoping that the girls will have a chance to try it out and learn something new. Especially for Jayne, she has always like to do such rock climbing activities.

My Little Climbing Room is situated at Promenade @ Pelikat, which is in Hougang area. As you can see, it is quite a colorful place and both my girls liked it immediately.

 

 

The climbing walls are categorized as fun, beginners, intermediate and advance. The fun walls are like the ones shown above, where the kids can just climb up and touch randomly selected numbers or go through the hula-hoops. Both of these walls do not required other equipment or ropes.

In fact, when Joey stood beside the number wall, she is almost half way there.

While Jayne took a bit more effort, but nonetheless it was not difficult for them.

 

Joey gave up on the hula-hoops obstacle course as she is more like her dad, quite stiff boned. Thankfully, we still have Jayne (that’s why it’s good to have more than one child). And her size is just perfect.

Another fun wall is to climb and touch the dots on the wall, and do it in the fastest time.

  

So far so good, until when we got to the more serious climbs. This was when I was suddenly buffered by Jayne’s reactions.

 

Jayne the courageous girl has become the timid gal, she was afraid of the heights and possible fall even though she was tightly supported by the ropes. On the other hand, Joey passed the test! She conquered all the 3 levels of rock climbing walls and was eager to do it again and again (until her fingers are too tired to grip anything).

What happened??

Is Jayne going through a stage of self realization? Realizing that she is not that “garang” anymore? Are the changes due to peer pressure in school?
One became fearful and the other became fearless.

Girls, if you are reading this post, Daddy is not telling you to be fearful or fearless. In life, never swing to the extremes, there is nothing absolutely fearful nor is there anything absolutely fearless.

“Fear not, be of good cheer, be strong and courageous.”

Don’t be fearful of anything, cos you have daddy and Daddy to take care of you. But be of good courage, learn to say “no” or to protect yourself when the need arises.
Don’t be fearless and live life with no discipline. Only with discipline can one learn to build character.

In the meantime, just enjoy the fun!

 

We are Growing Up Together

The girls are growing up fast. Time just ticked on without our notice. Nowadays, both my girls talk to me like an adult. Asking me questions like a normal friend. Questioning my decisions like peers.

Yes, I should be happy because they are growing up well. Doing ok in school, still obedient at home, loves church. But part of me, the aging part of me, is trying hard to slow things down.

Joey is 11 this year and soon next year she will be working hard on her PSLE. At the same time, she will be leaving her children church environment and going to a youth cell group life. Suddenly the thought that we may not be going to church together, having lunch after service, taking bus home after cell group fellowship, is so real.

She will have her group of friends in her first formal cell group. She will want to hang around her same age friends.

I will just “nag” at her to be careful and remember to come home earlier.

Oh .. the hard lesson of letting go. Am I ready for it?

Even now, almost every weekend Joey will be asking me for permission to go out with her school mates. Spending time at each other’s house, just talking about life, all 11 years of their life.
Or maybe go to the library and eventually hang out at the nearby Starbucks for a hipster ice blended mocha latte.

Today when we took the train home, the girls were seated opposite me and this photo got me thinking.
Pardon the weird dressing (Jayne’s jeans and dress), that’s because they just went to the Snow City, need to keep warm.

It’s not a bad thing to see the girls becoming more and more independent. I guess it is all part of growing up. As a father, parenting is also a process of growing and maturing. I think it’s time for me to mature in my thinking and slowly allow my girls to have their own lives soon. Yes, a huge part of me wants to hold them close and tight, but I have to grow up too.

Jayne just informed us that she is going to the pools on Tuesday night with her classmates. We have been informed.

Argh!! I hate to grow up!

I am a 11 years old father! I just want the fun times! No stress!

 

Road Safety Community Park

Some things never change. Some people never change. And some places never change too. Almost 30 over years back, when I was still in Primary School (when policeman wears shorts), I attended a road safety session at this amazing place along East Coast Park, somewhere near to the famous Big Splash swimming complex.

Back then, I was a motorist, pedaling my 4-wheel “car” around the Road Safety Park, trying my best to clear all the stations, making sure I don’t make any mistakes like driving pass the red light, driving on other people’s lanes, etc.

  

Fast forward to now, same place, same Primary School, but it’s Joey’s turn to be in the driving seat.

Of course the “car” has been upgraded.

 

The same nostalgic route card is still used for the students who are participating in the organized event.

Sadly, originally Joey was designated to be a Cyclist, but due to the rain and out of safety concern, all Cyclists were asked to be Pedestrians instead. But still, she is happy to just walk around the park and complete her course.

 

It must be more fun to be a Motorist.

Joey was very fascinated by the Shell Station. Everything is so real and it reminded her when we used to have a family car and how we visit the petrol station every now and then.

Miniature zebra-crossing lamps.

Hopefully, this trip will educate the young ones to be more courteous on the roads and learn the correct traffic rules.
Me, just another proud father where I can share a small bit of my history with my daughter.

Road Safety Community Park
Address: E East Cost Park Service Road, S(449889)
Contact: 6440 5254
Admission: FREE
Open to public for 24 hours, but some of the installations like traffic lights, rental of go-carts and bicycles will not be in operation unless the park is hosting a traffic game for a school at the same time. However, parents can still take advantage of the traffic facilities available, bring your own bicycles and teach your kids a little about traffic rules and safety.

Father’s Day Gift

I gave myself an early Father’s Day gift. Spending time with my precious daughter.

Took a day off from work just to bring Jayne out for a 1-to-1 date.

After having a simple lunch, we headed to Gardens by the Bay FEO Children’s Park. We had practically the entire water play area to ourselves.

It’s such a joy to see how she enjoys the simple things, like standing in wait for the water bucket to pour down the water.

   

 

Totally in love with her expressions.

  

 

Swings at the dry area.

  

Suddenly the song changed at the water play area, to one of Jayne’s favourite song – Let it Go. Immediately she was back at the waters dancing all over the place to the music. So cute!

And she did a series of jump shots for me right at the end.

  

Bath, changed and she cleverly asked me to bring her to a café.
Jayne: Papa, do you want to drink coffee?
Me: Hmm.. Why do you ask?
Jayne: Let’s go to a café, so that you can drink your coffee.
Jayne: I can also drink my ice milo… and play games on the phone, ok?
Me: (so that’s the real reason).

Proof that she got what she wanted. Ice chocolate and mobile game time.

 

Well, since it was my Father’s Day gift, I had the best deal in the end.