For some reason, I have decided to remove my iPhone 5 cover and it was one of the best decision ever made. Now I am truly enjoying the beautiful design by Apple. I read a tweet recently that said something like, “Apple spent millions to make their iPhone as thin as possible, but users spent $5 to buy a plastic cover and made it twice the thickness”. How true and funny that is.
After I took off the $5 phone cover, a few interesting things happened.
(1) I hardly drop my phone before that, but a few days after I took off the phone cover, I dropped my iPhone 5 on a cobbled floor and dented one corner slightly. Of course, I silently cursed myself for being so ‘kaypoh’ and regretted the decision for that half a day. But subsequently, I got over it and now as I looked back, it was just a small incident. I still prefer the phone with a small dent than the phone with a cover.
(2) Now, when my friends see my mobile phone, one of the first thing they will say is, “Wah, you did not put on a phone cover? That is so ‘garang’ of you. But the iPhone looks so nice without a cover”. All of a sudden, people are realising more of the phone I am using than before. And I have become a “brave” person.
(3) Previously when I had the phone cover on, I was thinking to myself that I will one day sell of my iPhone 5 when a newer model is out. But now, I have this unexplainable decision to keep using the phone until it is spoilt or at least until the line contract is over. Why? I don’t really understand, but I guess it’s because I have realised it’s real worth and beauty that I no longer feel like changing.
Strange enough, all these happenings got me thinking deeper into why did I feel what I felt.
And this is what I figure out - my iPhone to iParenting philosophy.
As a father, I did not start off with the intention to bring my daughter into this world so that I can protect her. My intention was to have someone to enjoy life with, to share my joy with her, and to see her grow up to be like herself, the way God has created her, a unique person. It’s the same like buying an iPhone 5, it’s not for the purpose of slapping a $5 cover on it to protect it. It was for the purpose of using it and at the same time flaunt it as a nice accessory. As Singaporeans, it has become a sigma that parenting equates being kiasu & kiasi. Are we too over-protective of our children? Are we putting a cover over their lives so much so that no one can see the beauty or creativity hidden underneath? I am reminded that a futsal kaki of mine is migrating to Australia by the end of this month with his wife and 2 kids. He cited the reason that Singapore has become a stifled place for his children to grow up in. His children are not getting the best out of their lives. Sad but to a certain extent true.
Parenting is not about winning but it is about handling failures. So what if I took off the phone cover, I will have a greater risk of dropping my iPhone and spoilt it? Just pick it up and continue with life after a short period of heartache. Similarly to educating my girls, I won’t discourage them to try new things even if I know the risk failure may be higher than not trying. But at least they will learn something out of it, which is definitely learning nothing out of not doing anything. I feel as a father, I want to encourage my girls to be a true champion, who is never afraid to fail but must never quit.
Which brings me to my final point, after falling and picking themselves up time after time, I pray that my girls will learn not only life-skills but also the importance of treasuring what they have. To be a contented person. One phenomenon I am starting to see in my own girls’ live is, not being contented with their current and always wanting more. I mean it’s not bad to have expectations and want to have more things in life. But that is definitely not the only purpose in life. And the fact of the matter is, most of our children in this age are already having more than is necessary. Why do kids need more than 2-3 pairs of shoes? Why do kids need more than 2-3 bags? Why do kids need to have all the toys? Learning to be contented is such a huge lesson. Even adults like myself is learning it constantly.
This is all my personal humble opinion of parenting and do not represent any group of people or society. Simply saying, do not crucify me if I may sound wrong in any of my writings.
Have a good iParenting day!