As a daddy, I quite expect my girls to listen to almost every command I give. Actually it did work out for the first 3 years of Joey’s life. She was the clever and obedient girl. Now she is already 5 years old and studying in K1. Jayne is already 2 years old. Sometimes, they no longer just listen to me like before. I was quite desperate and was thinking what was wrong. Are my girls entering into rebellion stage so early? Are my girls no longer obedient?
Now I have decided to stop all these negative thoughts. My girls are not naughty, they are not rebellious, it is just a part of growing up!
Especially since Jayne is born, Joey has learned to be more vocal and has shown maturity as an elder sister. Probably this is an inborn talent for all first-born to assume the responsibility of taking care of the younger siblings. Hence, they have become more decisive in handling problems. I have to sit back and be a listener. Be a guide. Be a mentor.
Earning a kid’s trust and respect is not as easy as I thought. Requires a lot of time and effort to ensure that both girls understand me. Of course it is slightly easier for Joey, she can communicate better than Jayne. Even though Jayne cannot communicate yet, but whatever I teach Joey, she will pick up immediately. So effectively, I am teaching both girls at one time.
Earning the right to be heard is BEING THERE.
My presence or absence impacts my girls’ behaviours greatly. How much I am willing to be involved in my child’s life will determine how much will they open up to me and share with me.
And learn to keep quiet. Don’t be too fast to add in my remarks or thoughts whenever my girls express an idea.